The greatest test of faith for a Jewish convert
My name is Eliana, my parents are not Jewish but, somehow, they chose that name without knowing that it would give me this identity that I have today. I am a converted Jew and today I feel that my name cannot be any other. My name means ‘God answered’; he answered my prayers, and thanks to Him we are here in Israel.
My journey towards Judaism began a little more than 15 years ago when I met Ilan at a Shabbat table. I remember that at the end he told me that I should say a blessing for being the guest. The feeling I had after that Shabbat dinner is inexplicable. I fell in love with the Torah from that day on and I knew I didn’t want anything else.
Ilan and I were part of small communities in Barranquilla, Colombia. Less than a year after we met, we were already making our first orthodox conversion and together we were building a home. We have two children Sari (14) and Eliel (12). As they grew up we realized that our place was not there, being constantly judged for having different beliefs and sometimes even being treated differently, or being separated from others were some of the things that drove us to dream about to come to live in Israel.
But sometimes dreaming is not enough. We went through a pandemic, lack of employment, the sudden death of my father and other very hard times but we never lost faith. Together with the help of our families and a lot of effort we were able to obtain the resources and in 2022 we traveled to Israel. We put 15 years of our lives together in a suitcase, moving away from my family, but at the same time reuniting with Ilan’s. It was a mixture of emotions, fears, expectations, joys and sadness; feelings that I imagine all of us who want to start a new life in Torah here in Israel feel.
We arrived at Shavei Israel where they welcomed us with great affection. Rabbanit Renana, Chaya and the three Rabbis who gave us classes helped us from the moment we arrived and guided us in this process that lasted a little more than a year and in which we learned everything we know and a little more. Ilan and I enjoyed the process very much, all the classes, conferences, activities and celebrations, it was all a very enriching experience and we feel that we will always be very grateful to Shavei Israel.
In July 2023 we had the Beit Din in which we finalized our process and they officially welcomed us to the Jewish people. We cried with emotion! It was with great joy that finally our greatest dream was coming true. That day we committed to fulfilling all the mitzvot and to continue on the path of the Torah and we felt that from there everything would be happiness. Our Rabbi had given us the good news that there was an organization that was going to help us plan our wedding but that it had to take place right after the holiday of Sukkot and that is when we had to pass the greatest test of our faith so far…
On October 7, 2023, one day after the Sukkot holiday ended, the war began that has not ended to this day. We lived days in terror, locked up at home, with a lot of uncertainty and, above all, a lot of fear, fear of not knowing what was going to happen to our lives here. We questioned whether to stay or return to Colombia and the sadness that the things we were planning could no longer be. Our Rabbi and many acquaintances had to go fight in Gaza and that is when we decided not to go anywhere; our home is here. Not even this difficult moment could make us falter; it is precisely in these hard moments when we must have more faith.
On Hanukkah, just two months after the war started, Shavei Israel told us that everything was a bit calmer, we could start again with our wedding plans. A youth organization was going to help us and although they told us that it was going to take a little more time, later we felt that at that point time no longer mattered so much. We understood that things only happen in God’s time and that if He made us go through difficulties it was so that in the end we would value more the blessings that we were going to receive.
In February we had our beautiful Chuppah in Nehusha. It was a perfect day. We were surrounded by so much love! People we didn’t know came to congratulate us and accompany us selflessly. It was a dream wedding; a beautiful place and wonderful people. We will always be grateful for them.
During this entire learning journey I heard the phrase said several times: “Being Jewish is not easy.” That may be true. But what is easy in this life? I think that if we do things with conviction and with love, then nothing will be difficult.
Being a converted Jew is my new identity. That doesn’t mean it has removed my old self; Rather, I see it more as a small change towards the good life that Hashem wants for all of us, where the most important thing is to have Him in the our heart, our home and in our relationships with others. When you are clear about this is when you are truly a good Jew.
